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[Joke/comedy thread] Post your jokes and comedy here

Posted: Wed Sep 13, 2006 7:00 am
by froggyboy604
Post your funny, lame, silly jokes, and comedy related stuff here.

Please don't post sex jokes, sexist stuff, racist jokes, and offensive stuff here .

Here my lame jokes.

Why shoudn't you fight a pig. It might give you a pork chop.

I dont do anything. OOO, you work for the government. neat.

Posted: Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:03 pm
by SetoTK
A lawyer had a jury trial in a very difficult business case. The client, who had attended the trial, was out of town when the jury came back with its decision, which was for the lawyer and his client.

The lawyer immediately sent a telegram to his client, reading, "Justice has triumphed!"

The client wired back, "Appeal at once!"

----

Mr. Jacobson decided to take a week off from the pressures of the office and went skiing. Alas, no sooner did he reach the slopes than he heard an ominous rumbling: moments later a sheet of snow came crashing toward him.

Fortunately, Mr. Jacobson was able to jump into a cave just before the avalanche hit. Just as fortunately, he had matches with him and was able to light a fire.

Hours later, when everyone but Mr. Jacobson had returned, a rescue team was sent to search for him.

After several hours they saw smoke curling from the cave and went to investigate.

Poking his head into the entrance, one of the rescuers yelled, "Mr. Jacobson, are you there? It's the Red Cross."

Bristling, the harried executive called back, "Get lost. I gave at the office!"

--

A police car pulled me over near the high school where I teach. As the officer asked for my license and registration, my students began to drive past. Some honked their horns, others hooted, and still others stopped to admonish me for speeding.

Finally the officer asked me if I was a teacher at the school, and I told him I was.

"I think you've paid your debt to society," he said with a smile, and left without giving me a ticket.

Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 7:45 am
by babydorkee
haha old pick up line.

heres another pick up line

did it hurt?


when u fell from heaven

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 11:33 pm
by froggyboy604
Dumb pick up line i heard on "Midnight money madness"

Did you farted? Cuz You blew me away.

Joke

Why dont you play Cards in Africa cuz there are too many Cheetahs.

It's kind of funny i guest cuz some people who live in The Gheotto also calls Cheaters, Cheatas.

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 1:20 am
by babydorkee
haha ewww on that pick up line

heres a joke..i guess..


"Are you sleeping on the job?"

"Uh, no boss, uh.. there's a bug in my eye, and i'm trying to suffocate him!"